A self-love tip is to stop periodically along the way to admire and love yourself for exactly who you are. YOU are so valuable (can also insert worthy or good enough). You are truly, deeply, and inherently valuable. You were born valuable. There is nothing you can or will say or do to change that, and no amount of trying to get this from anyone else is ever going to pay off.
For so many years and in so many relationships, I tried to validate my worth and value by striving to be valuable to someone else. I believed once someone found me valuable, I would instantly feel valuable. It didn’t work.
When we seek outside validation, we are not only not being true to ourselves, we unwittingly undermine and erode our self-esteem and worth.
The problem with outside validation is we can never get enough or it doesn’t last because there isn’t anywhere inside of us for it to land or to be held. We may work hard to be valuable to others, but knowing this won’t fill the void inside of you. You need to experience your value first-hand.
We need to own what we stand for and hold fast to our principles. This is where value gets rooted. It took me a long time to understand this, and to fully understand my value, I decided to break it down into simple questions I could ask myself about value.
In the next email, I’ll share what those questions were along with the liberating responses I discovered.